The poor guy walks up to the rich guy’s house. He’s down on his luck and needs some money. He rings the doorbell. “Hi there, I’m down on my luck, need some money, and I was wondering if you have any work I could do for you?”
The rich Guy decides to give him a break, and says: “Sure, my porch needs painting. I’ll pay you 50 dollars to do it for me.” “Sure thing, Mister, I’ll get started right away!” Time passes, until… “Hey Mister, I’m all done painting!” “Well, here’s your 50 dollars” “Thanks, and by the way, it’s a Ferrari, not a Porsche.”
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An old farmer died and left 17 cows to his three sons. In his will, the farmer stated that his oldest son should get 1/2, his middle son should get 1/3, and his youngest son should get 1/9 of all the cows. The sons, who did not want to end up with half cows, sat for days trying to figure out how many cows each of them should get. One day, their neighbour came by to see how they were doing after their father’s death. The three sons told him their problem. After thinking for a while, the neighbour said: “I’ll be right back!” He went away, and when he came back, the three sons could divide the cows according to their father’s will, and in such a way that each of them got a whole number of cows.
What was the neighbour’s solution?
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1. Sing the Batman theme incessantly.
2. In the memo field of all your checks, write “for sensual massage.”
3. Specify that your drive-through order is “to go.”
4. Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public consisting entirely of “Beeeep Bip Bip Beeep Bip…”
5. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.
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We met upon the Internet,
A friendship electronic,
Expressed alone in words and thoughts,
Inevitably platonic.
We live too far apart for us
To mingle in the flesh,
But much more close than family,
Our hearts and feelings mesh.
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